Just finished chapter 4... only reason I won't call it a masterpiece is because you aren't given the choice to say, "You're beautiful, marry me" right then and there on this moment haha. Seriously though, what an experience! I'll likely give some detailed thoughts after playing through the rest, but you should be very proud of what you have crafted. A must play AVN, for sure!
Hey, thanks for the reply, sorry for taking so long to write back!
I'd first like to say that this game is very valuable because it explores a niche many other devs and games take distance - and are at times ouright pushed away - from. So you creating this game is such a boon to the community, and that should always be at the forefront of any appraisal of it, I feel.
When it comes to the scope of the game getting too big if too much is added, I understand how that's a concern for any developer, and that you are aware of that pitfall and trying to avoid it speaks well of you. However, that argument I think I'd accept more if I were saying "please create this C route!" - which maybe it looked like I was asking for, when I said I wanted to act as this "mask of propriety, scheming behind everyone's back MC".
But since you say there is a way to avoid getting that Haruka scene, that already means there are two states - "had sex with Haruka" and "didn't have sex with Haruka." Both are already in the game, and I'm not saying to create additional ones. What I'm saying is that, imo, the game would be best served by having another "state flip" inside of the office room. So what decides if you go down state A instead of B isn't just the "strike choice", but also this would be second "office choice", which imo is justified because on the strike choice it's not clear that striking Haruka would irrevocably lead you to get sexual with her. To me the sexual ramifications of the choice were not nearly telegraphed enough.
I understand that your resources, of time and motivation, are limited. So it's totally fine if for you this is a non-issue, or you see it and think, "he has a point, but it places really low on my list of priorities." Continuing the game's story should always be, I think, amongst a developer's highest priorities - no one likes endless remakes of the early game when the whole is nowhere near finished. But maybe note this down somewhere, and it can be something you add/change once you complete the game, and are looking back at the entirity of it for potential things to improve.
Again, this game is valuable to the AVN community as a whole, as is you developing it. That's the most important thing here, and I'm rooting for your success. Be sure to take of yourself first and foremost, so you can bring this game to completion, for it's needed.
When you say interactive, do you mean just the act of clicking to progress the slide, or does it actually have choices? The media I first encountered - traditional Visual Novels - uses "kinetic" to mean a story that features no choices, but I've send some devs use it for their AVNs with the meaning of "not a sandbox", so I figured I would ask for a clarification.
Yeah, I got bad vibes when they updated the demo with those horrible AI generated voices, but them pivoting to AI art is a dealbreaker. This game was succesfully funded on Kickstarter, with 40% of the amount raised earkmarked for "visual and voice artists" so to employ AI tools instead is not only in bad taste, it may even step into scam territory. This is not what the backers pledged for.
The characters are quite fun/compelling.
That said, I didn't like how you are given 3 choices to not sleep with Aurora on one hand, then only 1 for Lisa and then MC has sex with her without input. I kinda wanted to do bad things to the cop beast-girl and then finally reward Aurora for her patience making her my first haha.
Hey bro, let the developer do his story. This is not the first "Caribdis" inspired out there, and when comparing it to a game like, say, "Marked by Eternity", I feel this game has a clearer idea of what it wants to be, and the things it sets out to do it does to great effect. More originality is not always better, if you don't know how to implement it. If this being heavily inspired by Eternum is a negative for you, that's valid. But that doesn't make heavily inspired things not valid. Some of the most well regarded works of fiction are heavily inspired takes on previous ideas.
Was liking it until the Haruka office scene. imo you should have a way to refuse her there once she kisses you, there should be a path where you refuse to see a girl you don't like as a valid human/emotional/sexual partner and just corrupt her by putting her in degrading situations involving others.
Despite saying through her one would have a choice to refuse, none's given, and MC just lets the situation escalate and get out of hand when at many points I'd have stopped it. I kinda wanted to go for a "looks proper to the students, and does the shady stuff behind their backs, them being none the wiser to his true nature" run, sad it's not an option.
Your love for storytelling shines through, making this a very enjoyable read.
Honestly, I don't like "dead-end" choices, but I appreciate that you put effort into them here. Personally, I like "in-universe" ones (like the sewer monster) as opposed to fourth-wall-breaking ones (like the director chair). When it comes to the NSFW choices, I've found most of the "didn't happen" ones to be quite funny, I can see a player picking them just for that haha. Mechanically I don't know what logic the game operates on (open/closed routes, affection points) but when you say no the counselor and she cuts the red balloon away? imo it'd be super cool if that happened each time you lose a girl's route, if that's how you're operating haha.
Again, had a very enjoyable time, keep up the good stuff!
Good game! The potential for a bad ending was there from the beginning, and I'm glad to see it actually exists. That said, I feel it could (should?) have been written more impactfully, so it leaves players who get it more satisfied. Maybe there could have been some thoughts about how at least you are fucking Ami and her plans over, or some flashbacks to times the girls said they'd rely on you, to make you question if that is really the right choice...
(Also, did I not reach far enough or does only chapter 1 have a title card?)
Just to reiterate, episode 4 was amazing! Now, as for the points you raised...
"- Unnecessary Covid talk
- Extremely long intro"
Honestly, from a standpoint of being able to fully appreciate this piece of art, I don't feel the Covid talk is at all unnecesary. It signals the context on which this project was born, and I think that's really valuable, when people pick it up on 20, or 50 years, and do their graduate thesis on "the early yeard of the AVN industry" haha.
As for the extremely long intro, I feel that while it is in fact long, it has a good payoff. At the end of episode 3, when MC is about to throw the ball and has those flashbacks, the audience is left feeling "oh, so that intro had a point - to set up who this character was, wants to be, and why he acts like he is". It makes the moment hit.
So, both being important to setting up who MC is - the event that made him decide to change, and what he needed to change from -, both being part of the work done to make MC his own character rather than just a player self-insert, I'd leave them in.
Ultimately it's your decision though, best of lucks on whatever road you take!
Another great update! Cheers, thanks for all the hard work!
I feel like asking some "behind the curtain" questions this time around. First, is it possible to actually lose someone's route yet? Because I feel like I gave someone a pretty clear rejection, yet even that route stayed open (not complaining though). Second, as far as the affection points are concerned, at what point should I be worried? When I have less than 50%? When I have less than 66%? And finally, will the choice of girl depend on who we invite to that festival Avis mentioned? Of course, feel free to not answer if it's secret!
Stopped playing after the Chloe date.
I hope some day the "no NTR/only virgin heroines" crowd realize the damage they've done to the AVN community during its early period. In line with that sentiment, I should you commend you for the bravery of giving Claire the backstory she has - just seeing something like that is part of your world elevates it, making me, the player, thing that nothing is off the table for the other heroines. Anna's past, while different, also deserves praise. Dark elements like those elevate games, in my opinion.
Alongside them, the most valuable heroine of the game has to be Iris by far. The "partner in crime" vibe of their relationship is really well achieved. I however stopped playing due to her being a forced romance. If that's the story you want to tell, all the power to you, just not a the flavor I like that much. If someone like sister heroines, by all means this game is for you.
I questioned the need of having be friends with benefits with the barista girl a fake choice, only to provide a real one down the line - however, it served as a good heads up that forced romance was coming, so overall its ok. If anything, the option to end things with some heroines was a welcome surprise. Again, I was kinda sad we didn't get one for who I really wanted it, Iris, however I get that relationship is needed for the story you want to tell.
Violet is great, however her asking for long-term commitment... I don't know if you as an author set her up for rejection with that, or if you have a great grasp on her character, since her wanring a longer relationship than the one she had with Liam makes sense.
I like Ethan, was kinda hoping you could set him up with someone haha.
Ava interested me, only started to develop by the time I stopped playing - maybe I'll pick it back up again later down the line! Good luck, and cheers!
After extracting the game files and downloading the patch, you need to move the patch into the "TroubleinParadise-1.0.0-" folder, then again, then move it into the "game" folder found within. That's where the patch needs to end up. Then just run the TroubleinParadise application, about 10 clicks in, after you can input a custom name for Iris, the game will confirm you have the patch installed and give you a choice about what you want her to be, before introducing the MC. If you see that, you did it well, if not you have to try again.
I had liked chapter 1 quite a lot, and I must say, chapter 2 does not fall short!
One of the strongest aspects of 1 to me was the worldbuilding: it was so detailed it gave me as a player this confidence that the author had the setting really figured out. That continues on this chapter, and while the first of the two exposition scenes (the magic instructor) felt a bit too cartoonily dismissive, the second one (the combat instructor) was straight up brilliant.
Delivered in a believable way for a character with his viewpoint, and crafted well enough that the subtle undertone gets across. It, coupled with the previous one, was enough to get me thinking "are we the baddies here?" - I suspect we most likely are - and you deserve all the props for getting such an idea across without spelling it out, but letting the player reach it by piecing together what you do give him. Trusting in both the intelligence of your readers and your skill as an author is a move that deserves so much praise.
The quizz while doing the plank may be another example of this. "Wrong." Oh, so there are right answers to these questions? Of course the instructor will have preferences, but to straight up tell you one way of thinking is right speaks volumes to their bias. Maybe the "chair" scene in the party is meant to drive that home, but I had already spent much time looking around and thinking "Who has to go, in the country? Who needs to rise?" by that point.
I think the best characters, by far (so far) are Hannah and Scarlett. The most layered and sympathethic to me - also, to me the best lines in the game are those you get if you turn down Hannah. And I love how she still got a big solo segment on, what I assume is, a lost-route state!
The story is interesting at every level. I want to see how MC develops his relationship with each of the love interests, I'm interested in the specialization choice (I was a lock for combat, but now I'm questioning that path), I want to see how the internal politics of the kingdom play out, and how the conflict between the warring states is solved (and the truth of it).
Props for the game so far! Very solid first two chapters!
(PS: Did Attack on Titan inspire you somewhat?
Certain elements of the worldbuilding make me think of it,
but maybe it's just me seeing similarities and parallels.)
JK is short for Joshi Kosei, "High-School Girl" in Japanese!
About forced love interests, I wasn't liking Yukari's library scene, but I decided to trust it was happening for a reason, and lo and behold, that was the case (just like it was for Aki's shorter bedroom scene). When it comes to Jun, I do not like her, however I have enough media literacy to understand things are building up to something with her (wheter I will like it is another thing, but I get she's important to the story you want to tell). When it comes to Mana though, I get how her family issues are neccessary for the plot to move forward, however up to the end of CH2 I never felt MC getting sexual with her (so early on) was. She feels like Miri and Nao, sub-heroines put on "having an early H-scene for impatient players" duty, only unlike them, her scenes are not avoidable (or, one of them is, but seeing the preceding one is forced).
When it comes to background characters, stuff like getting a chance to compliment one of them during the track and field choice I love, please have more of those haha. Main heroine who? Let me flirt with that unnamed tertiary character with 0 previous screentime haha.
Good to hear chapter 3 is almost done, I'll take a break and pick the game back up in a couple of months to play it all in one go!
I wanted to make this comment after finishing chapter 1, but I held on until finishing chapter 2 (is chapter 3 complete? Figured I'd take the chance to ask.)
Suzu is the gem of this game; she alone makes it worth playing, and elevates it to a straight 5/5. I don't think I've seen any other AVN do that "I brought a JK home" experience, and so well too. How she's written, the clothing and hairstyle choices, the subtlety it's all delivered with, the focus she gets, you should feel proud of yourself for her charatcer. I will sing the praises of CH forever due to her. If I get to pick a heroine for a solo ending I'm not hesitating, Suzu and MC will go to that shack in the woods!
Second most valuable heroine is likely Yukari. Now, I wouldn't say I like her, but I find it valuable that, having the chance to use her any one way, you choose to use her to show the consequences of narrowmindness and maybe attempt to be a positive force in putting a stop to them. Props there.
I was honestly relieved when I saw Aki's backstory, when I saw where things were heading I was afraid you were going to pull your punches, and I'm so glad you did not. The Anzou clan "particularity" is super interesting (I wonder what this means for Sae, with her being into masochism...)
Honestly the first thing I disliked about the game was being forced to fool around with Mana, only getting a choice on wheter to go further, rather than on if to start at all. Not a huge fan, but when you had that line of "I guess she likes to discover hidden things due to her family", you showed you have a solid grasp on who she is as a character, well done.
Ookami's slowburn is super well done, I want to see more of Machi, and I enjoy every time Chiya is on screen (big tip!) Aya is cute too, and I tend to hate that type of super forward character, so feel proud, you presented her well!
Please, don't ever give me a choice on wheter to shoot Jun in the head, because I'd blow her brains out so fast. (If that choice does appear, the game becomes an instant 10/5)
The amount of secondary characters makes me wonder if you have a plan for each of them or if you've forgotten some already, but they defitinely make the world feel lived in, so if that's what you were going for, you achieved it!
In sum, feel proud! You've crafted a great experience!
